............./ / THE LEGENDARY TIMES
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...../ / /./ /./ /./ /.../ /./ /
..../ /_/..\______/./_____/./__/.../__/./_______/ MUD
.../________________/ running on mud.aus.sig.net 9999
VOLUME FOUR, ISSUE FOUR February 14, 1997
Happy Valentine's Day! Happy LegendMUD Anniversary!
A Letter from Job
Newbies and You
THE LT ROVING REPORT
Characters and their Descriptions
The Legendary Times Personals
Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous
Please send your responses to articles to the Legendary Times address at
email@example.com. Letters to the editor and submissions are welcomed.
FROM THE EDITOR
Today is the Third Anniversary of LegendMUD. We've seen a lot of action
since that day when the original Founding Immortals (including Sadist,
Charity, Kaige, and Ptah) opened up their world to the net public from a
Macintosh computer on the Washington College campus.
Rufus is holding a player discussion/forum today at 8 PM CST in the OOC.
He's doing this because he's very concerned about the atmosphere of
distrust that that has been steadily building up on the mud for the past
couple of years. He'll be addressing concerns that players have been
passing on to him this past week (yes, he will address all of them). I
strongly urge everyone who can to attend the meeting (for more
information, see Rufus' post on the Discussion Board in the OOC).
PLAYER RELATIONS UPDATE
Sabella has rejoined the Player Relations Department. She thanks all
those players who sent her encouraging notes during the last few weeks.
She'll also be taking over the Legendary Times again (starting next
The Expies are coming! Once again, it's that time of year when mud
achievements (and goofs!) are celebrated. As he did last year, Flagg will
be sending out the ballots, and counting up the votes. Right now, he's
hard at work on the nominations ballot, in which you'll be able to
nominate your favorites in each category for inclusion on the voting
ballot. You can nominate items and/or Legendites in several areas,
including imm and player categories (as well as the ever-popular write-in
categories!). So remember to send in your ballot ('cause that favorite
mob can't win if you don't nominate'em!).
Spencer and Joule's Question and Answer Sessions are NOT held on Tuesdays
(as we mistakenly informed you last issue), but on Wednesday nights. Our
apologies for the confusion.
Just a reminder: for any questions that you have about descriptions,
check out the help files entry for them.
The hercules bracelet has been reduced in both stats and rent. However
an item of equal stats as the old herc bracelet has been placed in
another area on a mob.
Vikings: Most if not all of the punctuation bugs should be fixed, if you find
any, please let Sandra know directly.
Ireland: The serpent bracelet no longer has the same stats.
Egypt: The item formerly known as the serpent bracelet has been placed in
Egypt. Have fun looking! (and as a consolation, it is less rent)
India: Some minor changes, mainly adjustments in how a few of the mobs
function in that area. Arjuna is now the war leader he was originally
meant to be, the mystic has been toned down a slight bit, one new item
has been added and all exits in the non-dream portion of the area now
have extra descriptions. Also, the old dying cow will no longer be 'in
perfect health' when you look at him.
Shadowlands: It's gone through a minor facelift with some tweaking here and
there. It shouldn't take nearly as long to go through, I hope I've shortened
the total playing time of the entire area to about 2 1/2 hours with a
relatively large (8-14) group (for those of you who HAVE gone to
Shadowlands when it first went in and then again recently, the hounds
wander again. Have fun, and don't panic too much).
I see that the new punishment of deleting all of a persons character is
going to become a new and popular punishment for civil disobedience. I
find the conditions of the new rules highly alarming.
I sure hope I or anyone for that matter doesn't lose their temper and say
something on chat that they might disagree with. Look what they feel they
can do now. Maybe the atmosphere can become even less honest and more
superficial on Legend. Then we can be all shiny, happy people holding
As to Sabella's quitting. Bah! If you want to become an immort: deal
with it or don't do it! She didn't feel appreciated. Gimme a break. Of
course you are not going to be appreciated by the all of the player all of
the time. Deal with it. Just because you are on a mud doesn't mean that
it is going to be unlike real life. If your are going to be that
sensitive then get out of PR! The amount of time I have seen Sabella act
insensitive as a mort leaves me feeling little concern for her feeling
that there is a lack of appreciation of her. As a mort she used to be one
of Jag's henchwomen.
Job the no longer gregarious leper
[Editor's Note: I think you may have misinterpreted the policy statement.
We're happy to allow expression of ideas as long as they are expressed in a
civil forum. Hence the willingness to publish this letter. As far as the
issue of sensitivity, we're sure you'd agree that it is better to have
immortals sensitive to the players than immortals who are insensitive to
the players--and also better to have immortals than not to have them at all.]
NEWBIES AND YOU
(reprinted by special request of the Newbie Helpers)
This is being humbly submitted as my opinion on newbie matters. Some may
agree with me others may not but for what it's worth this is my opinion.
I would like to start this with a definition of newbie. As I see it there
are three types of newbie. There is the first time ever on a mud newbie.
There is the first time at Legend experienced mudder newbie. And there is
the new character for an established player newbie. Unfortunately I think
most of the trouble I have experienced from newbies has been from the last
group which should really be the least trouble.
The true newbie, the person who falls into category 1, deserves all the help
we can give them as far as explaining our system of play, getting good armor
for their level, and advice on mobs to kill and places to go. Funny, I have
NEVER had a true newbie be anything other than astounded by my generosity
when I have given them a little money, bought them some newbie gear,
them to Sherwood or Klein, told them how to con things, then told them to
go and kill with my blessings.
The next sort of newbie, the new to Legend but knows mudding sort, is
usually even more happy with the way I treat them cause they are usually
ready to be ignored on a new mud. Once in awhile I find one who asks me to
level them and after I explain that the Legend system isn't really conducive
to that sort of thing when there is too great a split in levels they are
USUALLY understanding and I have never been treated rudely by one of them
after I gave them what help I would and sent them off to kill.
I am often saddened, however, by the last sort of newbie. For those who
don't know me, I am a simple Victorian doctor who couldn't fight his way out
of a sack with his original stats and who isn't a great deal better of a
fighter now (but much happier with his stats this time). I tend to heal
others in my level range and can perform a nice entrance or calm so they
tend to put up with me all right, but I level slowly and fight a LOT of mobs
(level 41 and hasn't soloed a cap yet). I DON'T level people. Never have.
I WILL group with you for exp if you are within ten of my level either way
cause it is beneficial to both of us. A doctor's a real nice thing for a
tank to have with him. But even with all that what I want to say would be
true even if I WERE a tank.
When a newbie comes on and asks (or even demands) to be leveled I take an
instant dislike of this person. Especially after I politely tell them no a
couple of times and they keep asking me. It is even nastier for one to hit
me with a tell to help them as soon as I've signed on. It is particularly
frustrating for me since I don't really believe it is helpful for a low
level to try grouping with higher levels. I recently fell off a mountain
(as some of you may recall) and my wife and brother (levels 50 and 48
respectively) tried desperately to help me out and so we ran around
industrial killing things. I got 40 pts for the vampire as a level one.
And I could have been killed. After the rp aspect of it was done (they
REALLY did need to react that way in the rp sense), we split up and for
awhile I leveled a bit by myself, I admit completely that my dear wife
killed many a mob helping me get my memory back, but I WAS a level 50 and
she IS my wife.
The point of all this is I think newbies (all types) should hear how I think
leveling can be done both relatively quickly and have a lot of fun doing it.
My advice is GROUP. Group as often as you can. At low levels group with
others within 2 or 3 levels of yourself. The gap can widen as you gain
skills with which to benefit the group. The exp split never seems like
enough i know. It seldom adds up to the total available exp even when
fighting 'perfect matches' with like levels. I've never understood why but
I do accept that there will never be as much exp gained with someone as
appears in the total. However killing something alone will never get you as
much exp as the total available anyway. BUT when fighting with someone else
you have a waker, more damage inflicted per round, a bandager
(hopefully), a helper in carrying heavy objects (for example someone to
help you carry stuff to sell or money to bank), and company. Sure you
can probably take on the same mobs you kill together by yourself but how
long will it take and how long will you have to heal up afterward?
Together two level sixes got over 4000 pts each in 45 minutes recently
killing nothing but animals and an occasional slave.
When low level, kill everything in your path that you can *evil grin* -
NOTHING is beneath you! You'll level in no time. But be aware that things
con slightly differently in different places. Judge is much better than con
at letting you know if you really SHOULD attack something. But nonetheless
when in a new area try an easy or fairly easy first and see if it really is.
If so you can work up to higher and higher cons but don't get stupid. When
you have only 30 or 60 hps and something cons death it probably is. And
even with two of you 'Are you crazy" is gonna be a hard fight if you win it
at all most of the time.
Don't be afraid of exploring your world. There are LOTS of exp rooms out
there and all you have to do is enter one to get exp. Always use your exits
command in a new area. The gods were kind enough in their creation of our
world to let us know if we are willing to spend the time to type exits when
we are about to enter certain and irreversible equipment loss. All DT's and
some that are not always DT's appear in capital letters on LegendMud. Stay
out of areas you are warned against however like the Tara landscape and feel
free to ask me or some other higher level around for an escort to or from
Tara if low level cause even if you know the route their are still boars to
worry about. But remember an escort is just that. Passage to safer lands
then you politely thank the person and let them go their way unless
expressly asked to join them for some reason.
When grouped with someone play with your agg wary commands. Work out with
your group mate that when the tank starts the others will keep going agg till
the mob attacks them and then the tank starts going agg while the other
person goes wary till the mob changes his attacks and back and forth. You
will often kill the mob quicker this way and share in the damage some which
can be very useful with low hps to start with. A mob hitting four times
might be survived when two level ones each get hit twice but would die with
Lastly, but possibly MOST importantly for the low level is wimpy. Too
low a wimpy setting is responsible for more deaths than anything else
especially at low levels. When something does 5 hps damage to you each
time you are hit and your wimpy is something like 5 out of 20 you most
certainly will die if you get hit 4 times. First flee attempts are often
unsuccessful unless you have very high dex. I know that when I have low
levels I try not to have to flee very much by fighting things I know i
can kill cause 50 hps doesn't last long and half my exp is hard to make
up. But if you want to try a mob you have never fought set your wimpy
high (like 15 out of 20) and if you find yourself trying to flee right
off hope you can. I like to set
my regular wimpy at least 40% of my hps, even 50% when I have more hps and
can afford to be hit a bit before i flee. Remember you can't raise wimpy
above your current hps but you CAN change wimpy during a fight if you wish
so if you've got a mob down to dying and you see yourself try to flee you
can LOWER your wimpy if you'd like to try to stay and finish the job. One
other thing don't set wimpy full unless you are trying to use the strategy
of hit and run because instead of fighting you will keep trying to flee.
Lastly, to those high-levels out there who have been reading and nodding
their heads in agreement. Not all newbies who fit in the last category
behave badly. There is seldom a reason to be rude to a low levels first
contact with you. Even if they are mistakenly demanding your first No
should be polite. You can never be sure if the problem isn't just a
misunderstanding to begin with. Perhaps there is a difference in native
languages. Legend is truly a multi-national place. Or perhaps they had the
unfortunate situation of first time they were on someone took them and did
level them a bit so they think it's standard or they were on at a time when
someone else went up 15 levels in an afternoon and felt left out. Anyway
people seldom deserve to be treated rudely the first or even second time
they 'tell' to you. We should not be a world of snobs. Low levels DO need
some help now and then getting eq or accompaniment to a certain area or mob.
And a newbie who doesn't group with high levels and doesn't want to disclose
alternate characters for rp reasons (lets face it people DO react
differently when they find out who else you play) have a very hard time
getting eq before they can actually kill for it. Should a low level mage
'wanna be' not be able to learn certain words because they need a common but
hard for them piece of eq be denied the chance to learn a word at a low
level just because they haven't made high level 'friends'? Or a person be
denied getting a common skill cause they need a slight stat boost before
they can qualify for it? I'm not suggesting you run out and get wormys for
every level one on the mud, just that we all be more willing to get simple
eq for the lower levels. We used to be a happy family with high levels and
low levels helping each other. Vamp tag for corpse removal used to be a
sure thing. Lately I have seen people have to beg for someone to come help
them. Remember the newbie you scorn could be one of your closer friends and
be getting a look at your character you don't really want them to see.
I hope I have offended no-one. I am really only trying to help. Please send
input on what you have read as I really want to know how it is received.
Well, in the immortal words of Stan Lee, 'Nuff said.
--Farnsworth Kurwa the Wordy, Husband to Linda, Father of Alexis and Brother
of Zorn, Sage
The LT Roving Reporter
by Leila, LT Staff
This edition of the Roving Reporter, we celebrate the poet inside each one
of us and look at the many and varied forms of the extra description.
A gaunt and tired-looking merchant banker stands before you, trying his
look awake. His shirt and tie are colourful, and his smile is warm. He
wears odds and ends of an adventurer, and DOES succeed in looking
reasonably charming and exciting, but the tired eyes of a white collar job
give him away as one of the millions who slave away to survive, and survive
only to find no time left to live.
Tears well in your eyes as you resolve never to be a merchant banker, ever!!
-- What FairfaxII has to say about his extra description:
I just thought I'd take the mickey out of my real-life job. Merchant
banking is extremely stressful, and LegendMUD is supposed to be one of my
past-times. The irony of the difference between the ideal life and real
life sort of prompted my extra description, I suppose. It's a reminder that
real-life is bad enough, and that the MUD is supposed to be fun, so enjoy
That's the Philosophical explanation, - the practical one is that I had
absolutely NO idea what I wanted to look like in fantasy, so I just typed
in what came to mind.. I'll probably change it in the future.
Before you stands a very massive man. His arms and chest swell in his armor.
His smoldering grey eyes speak of a life of misery and betrayal.
On his body are numerous scars and tattoos. On his back
in glowing magical writing is the following:
And I saw a pale horse his rider had a pair of scales in his hand
His name was death merchant and hell followed close behind.
And just beneath in writing red as blood :
Thus shall mine anger be accomplished and I shall cause
my fury to rest upon them and they shall be comforted:
and they shall no I am the Death Merchant.
Arathon is slightly scratched.
As you look at Claudia, she raises an eyebrow and peers at you,
checking whether she should smile happily or raise her dagger and
stab you repeatedly. Claudia is draped in an ensemble of black
clothing, demonstrating her lack of dress sense. Looking up at
her, you notice her irresistably cute grin, and jade like eyes.
Feeling slightly embarrassed, you turn to look away and notice an
innocent twinkle in her eyes as you do so.
-- What Claudia has to say about her extra description:
She only trusts her sisters, hence the first sentence. She likes to dress in
black, because it's simple, and some of her sisters follow the same trend.
She likes to intimidate/embarrass men, hence the last two sentences.
He hiccups. That's what first draws your attention to the Scotsman lying
gutter here. He is quite obviously drunk, but manages to slur his speech
into barely comprehensible syllables to inform you:
"It'sh shtriktly f'r medishindal purposhesh."
He then moves back into his own world, and crackedly sings, "You tyke th'
hiiiiiiigh road, and I'lb tyke th' low roab, and I'll getsh t' shcotchland
As you look upon her you notice her ready laugh and subtle wit, and deep blue
eyes, quick beneath dark lashes. Her hair is tawny and her skin dark;
her body is well-knit, strong, and expressive, the body of a dancer
-- What Govan has to say about her extra description:
When I start a character, I try to envision the kind of person he or she will
be. Govan sounded like a mature name, and I began to see her as an older,
yet very fit and beautiful woman. She had a light spirit, but also had the
knowledge one obtains only by experience. After I decided upon her
personality, I added special features like her deep blue eyes merely
because I love blue eyes.
As you look at him, you cannot help but feel the warmth radiating from him
as a feeling of dejavu overtakes you.
Somehow you feel he's a friendly person.
-- What Asfw has to say about his extra description:
Asfw being my first character, he has ploughed through much trouble and
difficulty that first characters naturally encounter. In the 1000+ hours
spent on mud, he's been around as a helped newbie, a developing
mage/fighter, and finally as a mature player. Having run into all kinds
of mess, he's seen/been with just about everyone on the mud, not usually
as a conspicuous character but as part of a supporting background.
That's where someone might get a feeling of dejavu.
After this long, tiresome yet rewarding learning experience, there is
still much to discover. Nonetheless, Asfw has gained enough
power/experience to help most that need it. Knowing well the frustrations
of a newbie/semi-newbie, he makes an effort to meet all the requests he
receives and be nice to everyone. That's where the warmth and
friendliness comes in.
Role-playing-wise Asfw has had practically no experience. What comes
through in this character reflects the person at the keyboard. I guess I
want to be a friendly, mysterious sort of person. :P
You sink to your knees and worship this regal beauty's very existence, for
upon first glance you know that it is she...the Empress of Minutia.
Her Majesty hails from a mythical land deep within the Trivial Mountains.
Clan Angesley recently adopted the Empress for her knowledge of all that is
useless and her superior orb-making skills. Her Majesty's native tongue
is Riddish, but she is blessed with the gift of gab and will be more than
accommodating in your wish to speak English.
-- What Jen-Creature has to say about her extra description:
I won a couple trivia matches in a row...Aermid started calling me the
'empress of minutia'.
A fair, slightly built woman who radiates a sense of well-being.
A mischievous grin touches her lips and her wide green eyes
sparkle with laughter. Her waist-length mass of fiery hair
is bound in a single braid, at which she is perpetually tugging.
For just and instant as you meet her gaze you are struck by a sense of
something hidden in its depths that pulls at you.
Then she laughs and it is gone and you wonder what you were thinking....
A smiling, fiery-haired druidess is in perfect health.
-- What Aermid has to say about her extra description:
The first part of the extra description, the radiating well being, and the
gaze part, are referring to my being a druid. The braid part, well she can
get irritable, so she takes it out on her hair (yes I do have a hair tugging
macro...along with all my flopping macros.*grin*)
o O | Wonder what folks are |
`\|||/ | doing over at LegendMud?|
(o o) \________________________/
THE LEGENDARY TIMES
Leila, LT Staff
THE MEETING PLACE:
The fun, modern way to meet exciting people just like you!
My darling, my love, you're nifty!
Prithee, my Lady, who shows her love by her disdain, I implore
that you meet me by the Queen's fountain at noon on the day of
---A Ambassador of France
Happy St-Valentine's day to everyone...
I hope you who will love me one day can hear me and will think of me...
CLeo of the Circle of Angels
I am back... but that is just a rumor ya know.. *grin*
Rummy, you darling, you cutie! *smoochies* Be my valentine,
Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue,
But blood is more red,
Especially from you.
Happy Valentine's Day to all at LegendMUD. We wish you all the romance
and adventure of the day.
--The LT Staff
I've missed your companionship these past week. Could I take you to dinner
sometime soon? (We'll leave the boggles at home.)
Hello friends, I have just left my hometown of Lima to seek my fortune.
Alas! my path is hindered by the unfortunate accident that left me unable to
speak. So if you should meet me on your journeys, please take pity on a poor
Well, I have been asked to talk about that strange Scot McDougann, but I
dunna think I can wi'oot embarashin th' entire Scottish race!- Oh... just
haw he lukes? Weel, I'll tell ye haw he lukes- uncouth, drunken little
sot... Bah! Talk to that bloody Lancashirian, Cuerden! E'S the one that
led him onto the path he be on! Let him take the responsibility!!!
What? This is highly irregular! I'm just McDougan's oft-ignored by him
player! -Oh, that thing... Yes, I wrote it. Seemed harmless enogh,- at
And now you want me to dredge up the rememberances about that Scottish fool?
Well, If you insist, I wouldn't mind tossing a couple of jabs at him!
I don't think visually., It's just how my mind works- but sounds, tones of
voice- THESE are the things I remember and thrive in, and so naturally,
I'm not going to be remembering he details of meeting McDougan as you
But in anuycase, back to my actual description of the sot...
I start the description off with how he got noticed- without the hiccupping,
he's just a pile of tartan rags in a gutter, and you would just pass on by.
I continue by describing him as a Scotsman (to fill in just a little visual
detail- kilt, beard, red hair- all impliable by race)
Now, after that, I set up for his mode of speaking- (obviously drunk,
slur his speech...barely comprehensible syllables)
And the actual statement he says is one of his catchphrases- That and
"Ish gsh fr what ales ye' were the two things I wrote down and forced him
to say earier on in his drunkeness to try to get McDougan to come out to
take over. Then, of course, something has to happen to end the scene, so
McDougan returns to his own little world, and, because he's a musical
person(though very bad
at it- His most oft played tune on his bagpipes right now is brain-disolving
discordance of course, a lot of drunks are known to hang about in gutters,
and to sing.....
McDougan could not be reached for comment, since he was in a drunken stupor.
Oh... yeah... we forgot....
Having grown up quite a bit since her first long description, Xatreka is
no longer "A very young little girl is here, studying her
books." Instead, she's now " A young lady is here, studying her books."
Diet has reached level 50! (be sure to congratulate him =)
Lirra is holding a contest to get a new set of poofs. She's feeling
terribly uncreative and is offering the mud community a chance to earn a
coupon. Submissions will be taken up until February 14th. Only one prize
will be given out to the poof that is liked best, and that poof will be
used whenever you see Lirra walking about. Have Fun ;)
I dunna coomprehend whoot heppened t' Dushty.. ebidentchly, she goot shtolen
away by th' reshcue team.
If anyun sheesh any groanin' tortchured piratesh.. thnnn...
oom.. then pash oon by, nnd luke fr a group that be uproariously laughing.
Desperately Seeking Player Playing Armada!
Leila ran a 1st to 5 competition and is now looking for the person who
played Armada. Please mudmail if you know him/her or tell to her if you are
the character/know the character.
--Thanks! Leila Pax.
I am looking for old Worlds of Carnage alumni.
I have played there off and on since 1990 and have made
and lost touch with several friends over the years.
The intent is to put together (initially) a distribution
list of Carnage alumni from Carnage, Cythera, and LegendMud.
If you have any alumni there who would like to be on the list
please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
I've already collected over 30+ current addresses of
Carnage alumni and hope to collect many more-
(remember the nights when there were 100+ players on?)
Thanks for any help you might be able to provide...
Greetings fellow naturalists!
There has been many great druid clans come and go over the years,
and it is our hope that, with your help, this will be one that stays!
Please join us at 10PM, Eastern Coast time, on Sunday the 16th, to
discuss the foundation of this Role Play clan dedicated to the ways of
nature and natural healing. We will discuss clan structure, goals and
vote on members (and hopefully a name)! See you there!
Please direct all Personals by mudmail to Leila, there is no guarantee that
personals sent to the LT email address will be printed.
Little wolf brother, I will run for you
and share the bite of the frost on our paws
Little wolf brother, I will hunt for you
and the blood of the kill will slake our thirst
Little wolf brother, I will howl
and hurl our challenge towards the winter moon
For you are trapped, and I am free
to run and mate and fight
and join my voice with the packsong
on a cold December night.
The wind will never touch your fur
but I am trapped as well,
my soul is caged as surely as yours
within this human shell.
So when the light of the hunter's moon
shines down and touches me
I'll raise my voice in challenge
while our spirits both run free.
CLeo of the Circle of Angels
Hellow and welcome to "Who's This?". For this second issue, I interviewed
Diamanda. Here's how the interview went.
CLeo - 'One day, you notice that your watch can take you anywhere in time.
In which time would you go to?
Diamanda - 'I suppose I'd like to go to ancient Greece to meet a real harpy
and sing with her.' (harpy: a foul malign creature in Greek mythology that
is part woman and part bird)
CLeo - 'If you wanted to be asked a question, what would it be?'
Diamanda - 'What does being a witch, and being a member of the Coven mean
CLeo - 'What does it mean for you?'
Diamanda - 'It means sisterhood. It means women sticking together and
supporting each other when men or even some women try to put us down. It
means finding the strength, that little piece of the Goddess, within
ourselves. One of us alone is nothing, but together we are everything.'
CLeo - 'What animal compares the best to your character?'
Diamanda - 'The eagle. I remember this passage... "Doth the eagle mount up
at thy command, and make her rest on high. She dwelleth and abideth upon
the rock, upon the crag of rock. From thence she seeketh prey, and her eyes
behold far off. Her young on up blood... and where the slain are, there is
CLeo - 'What is your worst nightmare?'
Diamanda - 'Losing my voice.'
CLeo - 'Please tell us a joke.'
Diamanda - 'You're driving through the desert in your boat, and you get a
flat tire. How many pancakes does it take to fix the hole in the roof?
Answer: Blue, there are no bones in ice cream.'
CLeo - 'Eh?'
CLeo - 'If an angel could grant you a wish, what would it be?'
Diamanda - 'I have no wish. I am complete.'
CLeo - 'If you were a kitchen appliance, what would you be?'
Diamanda - '*ROFL* If I were a kitchen appliance, I'd be a coffee maker!'
CLeo - 'What is your goal in life?'
Diamanda - 'To do good to my sisters, both those in the Coven and those not.'
CLeo - 'If your mind could take you on a real trip, where would you go?'
Diamanda - 'Any island in the Caribbean.'
Of days winter and cold I watch from sunbleached sands
and look beyond the sky's edge toward this other land.
Pride flows hot in this eager blood born unto this place.
But to the past I would follow away from this time and space.
Thoughts create reflections of thistle and tartan splendour.
Old worlds renewed like the lovers' kiss, I crave the sweet and tender.
One foot leading to the future, the other in yesteryear.
Many generations have left her shores, yet still I must travel there.
And born far away I hear the call, my feelings forever roam.
Two worlds to minds I live them both, this new land
and Scotland...my homes...
Rivers freeze solid
I hear winter's song blowing through the clouds
Wishing that we were holding on,
But that last sweet contact
Just couldn't last.
We both wanted to try
We lost so much in so short a time
Enjoying it all, smiling, laughing
You've gone now and I miss your touch
So I send this last kiss
Floating on a snowflake.
LIFESTYLES OF THE RICH AND FAMOUS...
Robin Leach interviews Zoop, CEO of the Merchant Mages
Here in the sprawling estates of this luscious privately owned Caribbean
island, is a man who is making his mark in the fast-paced and cut-throat
business world. Zoop, CEO of the recently incorporated Merchant Mages, is a
quite spoken man whose laid back attitude belies the quick and calculating
mind of a business tycoon whose bright star is streaking its way across the
Legendscape. We have the pleasure of taking some of his precious time to
see the lifestyles of this truly rich and famous man...
"Thank you, Zoop for giving his this opportunity to see you behind the
scenes," Robin drawls as he shakes Zoop's hand.
"My pleasure Robin. As those who have dealt with me before know, I am
always happy to make time to talk to people," Zoop replies.
Robin settles himself in front of Zoop's spacious marble lined office, "Let
me start first by understanding your personal background. The Zoop behind
the CEO; the drive and energy of the man behind the meteoric rise of the
"An interesting question," Zoop replies immediately, "Where shall I start?
The beginning I suppose... I began life in humble surroundings. Born to
immigrants living in the Arabian city of Agrabah, I had a rough
childhood... facing death many times at the hands of the less scrupulous
elements of the city. It was there that I learnt the harsh realities of
life, and that you think fast or be defeated. I don't mean just physical
battles, but also mental battles and that on-going battle to improve one's
status in the world."
"I learnt the ways of street combat in those tiny alleyways and it wasn't
until I was older that I ventured to the local magician to take on an
apprenticeship to learn the mystic arts. It was hard, oooh so hard, to
learn to use intellect instead of brawn, which led to several near death
experiences. Once I had gained my apprenticeship, I ventured into the
world, learnt the ways to traverse across time and met other adventurers of
a similar mind."
"I explored the worlds before me and sought not for fame or fortune. It was
only in the recent past, when I was in dire need of some equipment to
augment my art, that I realized that there was something missing in the
Robin interjects, "Missing?"
"Well, it dawned on me," Zoop explains, "that there needed to be someone or
better yet a group of people who could help those in need."
"Oh I see! There is already a group which helps those who have just started
their exploration of the world, but none who are there for those who need a
higher level help."
"My point exactly," Zoop agrees, "None who would sell unique or hard-to-get
items. None who would be available for hire to help repair damaged items,
nor provide backup support when adventuring into dangerous territory. Which
is why I decided to start up a new company, called the Merchant Mages."
"Hmmmn..." Robin ponders, "You know, I must admit I, like everyone else,
have heard of the Merchant Mages, but don't really know what the company is
Zoop smiles knowingly and shares, "Quite basically, we provide equipment
and/or service for a fee. Equipment is obviously where we retrieve or
locate equipment to fulfill orders placed with our company. The service
potion provides fulfillment of our customer's desires. Service includes
magical and mundane repair of their equipment, accompaniment on adventures,
possible purchase of equipment, as well as (and I think this is the most
innovative aspect of the Merchant Mages) acceptance of consignments!"
"Consignments?" Robin asks, "What do you mean?"
"The Merchant Mages is a large organization with many members," Zoop
answers, "With our huge network, we can act as the middle-person between
adventurers for the sale of equipment and/or services, for a nominal fee of
course. For example, if one of our customers wants to buy an earring, and
another one of our customers wants to sell an earring, we will handle the
sale and return the money (minus the commission) to the original seller.
Our commissions are negotiated individually, but I think you'll find it
"Now that brings up an interesting point," Robin retorts, "What is
"The Merchant Mages only believe in Capitalism. The law of
supply-and-demand. Consequently, you will find that our prices are always
reasonable. Additionally, we only sell items in perfect condition and also
provide free delivery as part of the sale."
Robin asks, "How are the Merchant Mages different from the other Clans that
are in already in existence?"
"Well, it is similar but also different. The most obvious point is that the
Merchant Mages are not a "clan". We are a company. We are incorporated, and
I can show you the legal papers which prove that we're legally a company.
We don't have "members" but "employees". Similar to "clans", we help other
employees out where possible, so there is a lot of camaraderie within our
"How does someone apply for a job?"
"The Merchant Mages only hire those who have knowledge of the magical arts,
and experienced in the way of the world: specifically Mages who are Level
25 or above. We also take Mages of lesser experience as Interns, and
experienced non-Mages as Associates. Those interested in joining our
company, must submit their application to either my Senior Vice President
of Sales, Stradivari, or myself."
"What are the benefits of joining your company?" Robin questions.
"Oh," Zoop quickly responds, "We have three simple rules for our Corporate
Code of Conduct."
"First, every member must be available to provide service and/or equipment
for a fee. Every member abides by the supply-and-demand rule, and may
charge whatever is deemed reasonable. Anyone who overcharges will face a
reprimand or termination from the company. I would like to reiterate that
with any purchase, delivery is always free, and we only see undamaged
"Second, it is every member's duty to enhance and promote the Merchant
Mage's brand-name. This includes advertisement by providing discounts, and
endorsement from our customers. As you know, we've been running a very
comprehensive advertising campaign recently. We're also very pleased with
the sponsorship deal we made with Morphine, the reigning Number 1 Champion
Robin interjects, "A stroke of marketing genius! What made you think of
"It's just a business deal. At the end of the day, it's a sport, and we
sponsor sports personalities, like most major corporations," Zoop calmly
Zoop continues, "And lastly, all employees are encouraged to recruit other
enterprising individuals who might fit well into our company. Although I
must stress again that only Stradivari or myself make the final Human
Resources decisions. The advantage is a large company is so that we have
representation at all hours, in order to obtain the best possible price for
anything, as well as always being on-hand to take any contracts from
Robin smiles, "And how would someone differentiate a Merchant Mage from
just any other vendor?"
"Merchant Mages are instantly recognizable as they sport the Corporate Logo
(with the Corporate Colors) in their title. People should feel free to
contact these individuals to order equipment or arrange for the provision
of any other service."
"So what is installed for the Merchant Mages in the future?"
Zoop glows with pride and replies, "The Merchant Mages has certainly had an
auspicious start. Within 1 week, we have over 10 members, far exceeding
many other organizations. Our income has increased by more than 5000%, and
our brand-name is relatively well known now. I am also proud to announce
that we have members who are experts in almost every part of the world, so
whether it be in Celtic Ireland all the way to Hell, Merchant Mages is
positioned to meet whatever needs there may exist!"
"Thank you for giving us the opportunity to meet with you Zoop," Robin
So we have been privileged to be given an insight into the man at the helm
of one of the fastest growing company the world has ever seen. So from
Robin Leach on location at Zoop's Caribbean residence, I wish you well...
and don't forget to catch the Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous next week
when we'll interview the legendary Sultan of Arabia!
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