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  .../________________/       running on 9999
VOLUME SIX, ISSUE FORTY-THREE                          November 16th, 1999

                            TABLE OF CONTENTS

                             NEWS & REPORTS
          -                The Immortal Report                       -
          -              Cooking Contest Results                     -
          -          From the Scrolls of the Ancients...             - 

          -                   Announcements                          -
          -                The McDougan Report                       -
          -                The Holy Privateers                       -

___                                                                    ___
\  |------------------------------------------------------------------|  /
/__|                          NEWS AND REPORTS                        |__\

                            The Immortal Report

Admin Dept:

Charity updated herblore and updated helpfiles, added new links to the web
site, did some enabling and a few housing reimbs.

Chocorua dealt with a few people who were over rent and lost eq, and some
by-request deletions.

Building Dept:

Charity revised amulets, and did some review work on Malta.

Cheyla talked with testers, and did a bunch of strings and assorted online

Kae tested Malta and Tudor, did housing reimbursals, and fixed things in
Malta in response to comments from testers.

LadyAce worked on acts and rooms for Klein.

Rusalka worked on her Tudor update and tested Malta.

Coding Dept:

Ea! worked on planning skills for trees, fixed a few minor bugs, and updated
the coder todo list.

Rufus tweaked forge and runelore code for trees, and worked on the design for
new fight skills. He also optimized the code to use less memory and run
faster, added bulletproofing to some places, fixed some crashing bugs.

Snapper updated the windows version of the mud and fixed bugs with it.


LadyAce did lots of the standard online stuff -- skill/housing reimbs, LT, Q
& A, strings, restrings, descriptions, etc.

Natalia discussed issues with, and explained things to, various players, and
did strings and restrings.

Rusalka did a lot of reimbursing for the housing bug, as well as strings,
restrings, and question-answering.


Halloween Cooking Contest Results
Nietzsche    - Best In Show for coconut ice with brandied
               apples, honey, and hazelnuts, garnished with a
               gingerbread star and served in a succulent melon
Jesse_James  - Best Name for "Jesse James Wild West Brunch"
O'Bedlam and - "Worst" Treat for their intoxicating beverage,
Alejandro      A Drunken Druid, mixed in the vampire's corpse
Sandman      - Best Impromptu Presentation from the audience,
               for Death Incarnate Soup

            /                        \
        o O | Wonder what folks are   |
  `\|||/    | doing over at LegendMUD?|
   (o o)    \________________________/
___                                                                    ___
\  |------------------------------------------------------------------|  /
/__|    LEGENDITES: Information Regarding the People of Our World     |__\


Shine has reached 200 million experience!  

Roark has reached 100 million experience!

Melanie has reached 100 million experience!



While Melanie pursues her solo career, she takes a break from the Spice Girls
and sheds her Sporty Spice role.  For anyone that's looking for pictures or
autographs from her, search for:

Long desc:
A spunky, tomboyish pop-star enthralls you with her scouse accent.
Short desc:
Melanie C

Clan News:

Hassan disbanded the Assassins Clan.

Squall disbanded the Ministry of Darkness Clan.

There are currently 30 clans active, which leaves space for 2 more to form.


'Tis my pleasure to formally pronounce Michel the newest squire unto the
Knights of the Temple. Greet him well where you meet him, for the Lord
walks with him.

Tancred de Gisborne,
Master of the Temple

                        <-I-> <-I-> <-I-> <-I-> <-I-> 

                            The McDougan Report      

Right then, thish week wash intereshting, boot in an addled, droonken short
o' way.

Beshidesh the mad dash tae shave m'hoose, ash a wee brashelet left oon the
floor by a weel-meaning lad caushed m'rent tae leap, and m'cash tae dwindle.
Joosht caught it in time.  Bluidy eshpenshive, a hoose, there was also an
attempt tae mairder me.  Och, beware dark ashashinsh.  Tha' ale he gave wash
coffee.  I tink.  Or it might hae been reeely dark ale.  Och, I may owe the
lad an apology.  Hic!  Weel, anyway, in the continuing Shpot the McDougan
feature, Rana and Laurana weer booth aroond thish week.  Och!  Ye cannae get
rid o' a guid McDougan, much ash a loot o' ladsh try.

My requeshtsh feer a dishtill command fell on deaf earsh.  Boot, oon the
oother hand, my requeshtsh feer drinksh at the pub fell oon lishtening
earsh.  Thush bartendersh are better than immortalsh.  A wee competition by
the way - If ye cauld find me a wee fountain o' whishkey or firebreather, ye
cauld win... a haggish! Och aye!

Thish week's interview ish of Terrorshpawn, dark minister of coffee and

Wha' is why I dinnae gae tae interview him, boot invented an interview
froom a point o' shafety.

    Me:  Sae, ye're Terrorshpawn,  Defender o' the Ishlamic faith if I
    TS:  Yes, offendi.  We believe in strict sobriety.*
    Me:  Och, lad!  Boot ye're trying tae poishon me!
    TS:   Yes!  Because unlike most, I am here to wipe ye drunks off the
face of the earth!
    Me: Achh!  But did ye e'er reckon wi' m' bad breath?
    TS: What's that, offendi?
    Me:  (Breathes on him)
    TS:  Ack!  I'm melting, melting... My world... I'm melllllllting.
    Me: Och, shoomun clean oop thish wee puddle?
*Probably.  I'm nae getting closhe enoof tae ashk.

Note:  Thish shauld nae be taken tae be againsht Ishlam.  The crushadersh
are againsht drink ash weel (Thoo I hae shlipped a wee bit o' the stoof
intae Tancred'sh drinksh in daysh o' yore tha' I'm shure he'd rather forget.
Or repeat.  Hrrd tae tell wi' him, ash hish mind cannae transhlate
m'mooch-increashed shlursh anymair.)

    Tae closhe the report, A wee guide for thoshe wha' hae trooble wi'
undershtanding me:
    Dreenk mair.  It'll aul becoom clear.  I tink.  If nae, at leasht ye can
sheek membership in the clan and poshibly lairn tha' way.
    Och, and a wee noot tae the oother McDougansh:
    There'sh a shtill in the hoose.  Feel free tae ushe it...


                        <-I-> <-I-> <-I-> <-I-> <-I-> 

                            The Holy Privateers

"The waters of Legend are populated with the robbers of the waves:
the deadly pirates of the Brotherhood of the Coast.
The pirates of Legend are united by a common cause: freedom.
Freedom from the tyranny of the Lords of the land.
Freedom from the shackles of the Church.
Freedom from greedy money lenders.

Pirates sail where they want, take what they please and life a life of freedom
unknown by any other man in the world.

And with the Crusades and their neverending money-hunger, things have
become even better for pirates as Kings and Queens hire daredevil adventurers
to explore the unknown and bring back the booty they discover."

I, Cabal Ortega was one of these deadly pirates known as the Brothers of the
Coast.  A little bit of a traitor, I was constantly raiding the Den of
another tribal community of pirates, naming themselves People from the
Tortuga Island, as they betrayed the code of the Pirates which constantly
asked us to live and die on the sea.  Jewels and gold coins, I won enough
money to buy myself a brand new Clipper, "The Bizantine Lady" and its whole
crew of 15 healthy (well, not drunk) pirates. As you can now realize it
through my writings, I'm a literate pirate, not one of these village idiot
sailors that can only express themselves with two words "bottle" and "rum".
And that probably saved my life...

During these days of anachronistic history that makes this world so
attractive, I was sailing my fierce ship towards the rich island of Malta.
Well, in fact, I was trying to escape a fleet of armed Venetian Merchants,
that once accused me to have stolen their map to the lands of Koubilai Khan.
I was heading directly into another but far bigger danger : the fleet of the
King Phillip II the Augustus, who was himself heading his whole army to Acre,
in order to ban the infidel Saladin from the Holy Lands.  The King of France
ships were far more armed that mine and some of them, were even
faster...Wisely I quickly surrendered. 

My men were put into the moist Pit that was used as a jail and the back of
the main ship. Myself, conducted before his Majesty. Alas, Guillhem de
Lecoque, the King's advisor recognised me and decided I shall be hanged in
the minute as a traitor to the crown! Someone then emerged from the crowd of
the curious sailors and, surrounded by a mystical cloak of air and darkness,
he whispered some words at the King's ear.  

"My honored advisor, the bard Israfel is right," said Phillip II the
Augustus. "We are currently lacking a lot of money if we really want to
eradicate the doomed muslims from the Holy Lands." The king peered at me with
his cunning glance.  "I shall hire you as a Privateer for the Crown of
France, Cabal Ortega," said His Majesty "Your mission will be to continue
your job of Looting and piracy, you will please just gimme back your Booty!"

"I will follow him around the world my King" said Israfel. "I will spy on
him for you, so you'll be sure he is on the right path."  Israfel, lord
of the air and darkness, bard of Legend, then turned on me...and smiled at
myself with a discrete smirk. Well, all I could say was that our team would
be all but boring and convenient...

Israfel and I landed some weeks later on the shores of Acre, near the muslims
troops. Disguised, we were heading through Palestine in order to reach the
army of beggars lead by Stick that was forming to assault the fortress of
Alamut from where the Old man of the Mountain sent his assassins over the
world. Israfel guessed that the booty we could grab from pillaging Alamut
would allows us to buy new canons for the "Bizantine Lady".  The Hashashins,
smokers of hashish, was a sect of perfect murderers that were worshipping a
Shiite form of Coranic allegiance. They were terrorizing the population of
Palestine the last centuries.  As we were roaming through the streets of
Jerusalem, we were stopped by a troop of Knights of the Temple.  

"Halt!" said the chief Templar "I recognize you as Cabal Ortega and the bard
Israfel, your disguise is just pathetic!" The Templar suddenly laughed with a
huge cackle. "Guards! Let them go, I will just go with them to Alamut."

Israfel and I gasped with a surprise. "How come Lord Templar? Why would you
risk your life in the realm of the Pagans?"

"Hehe, I'm just aware of your mission, Privateer. If you fail to give Phillip
II the money he wants, he will just took it from us Templars, and pillage our
treasure." The Knight Templar shook our hands.

"My name is Sir Eadric of Horsham, I will bodyguard you through the Holy
Lands, and make sure you come back alive from your adventures."

The three silhouettes then faded in the the dust of the streets, running with
the wind, to a new life of adventures.

(To be continued)

"Of course, if said adventurers lower their guard for even a moment, they'll
see the black flag just a moment too late."

Legendary Times is published by the immortals of LegendMUD. Please send
all replies, additions, or corrections to our address at [email protected]
for inclusion in the next edition. We, however, reserve the right to
moderate this discussion, and may object to some submissions.
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