Previous Issue Main Index Next Issue
 ............./     /            THE LEGENDARY TIMES 
 ............/     /             
 .........../     /.....______.._____.....______.._____.......____
 ........../     /...../     /./     \.../     /./     \...../    \
 ........./     /...../  ___/./  ____/../  ___/./  __.  \.../  /\  \
 ......../     /...../  /_.../  /....../  /_.../  /..\   >./  /./  /
 ......./     /...../  __/../  /____../  __/../  /.../  /./  /./  /
 ....../     /_____/__/__../  \_\  /./  /__../  /.../  /./  /_/  /
 ...../               / /./       /./     /./  /.../  /./       /
 ..../               /_/..\______/./_____/./__/.../__/./_______/ MUD
 .../________________/      running on 9999
VOLUME EIGHT, ISSUE SIX                                      April 10, 2001

Editor's note:
It's been quite a while since an issue of the LT hit your doorstep. I
apologize for the delay! You will be getting several LTs in rapid succession
over the next week or so as I go through my backlog of submissions, but I
also want to include recent events, so please continue to send in your
Yours, LadyAce

                           TABLE OF CONTENTS

                           Calendar of Events
                       NEWS, REPORTS, & UPDATES
                  Finding People With Similar Interests
                        March Madness Tinyplot
                     LegendMUD Connection Analysis
                          Gangwars PK Tourney
                             Recent Updates
                       Madame Decara's Horoscopes
                       On Myself and Other Things
                             Melting Frost
                           In a Muddy Field
                       FANGS FOR THE MEMORY - Part 1


___                                                                        ___
\  |----------------------------------------------------------------------|  /
/__|  LegendMUD Calendar of Events                                        |__\

           [All times are system time unless otherwise specified]

         {}-{}-{}-{}-{}-{}-{}-{}-{} April {}-{}-{}-{}-{}-{}-{}-{}-{}

       Thursday, April 12th  7:00 pm  Q & A in the OOC Auditorium
       Sunday,   April 15th        Happy Easter!
       Thursday, April 19th  7:00 pm  Q & A in the OOC Auditorium

___                                                                        ___
\  |----------------------------------------------------------------------|  /
/__|  News, Reports, and Updates!                                         |__\

                  Finding People With Similar Interests

This sounds easy, right? Didn't I just claim that everyone who plays on
LegendMUD has similar interests and that's why we're all here? While that
is true, it's often not enough to really cement meaningful relationships
between players and their characters.

So.. how to find other people who wanna play the game the same way?

Players Behind the Characters:
  If you want to find out more about the people behind the characters,
  there are several things you can do. The chat channel is a great way to
  see who else is chatty and learn more about people as well. However, if
  you're not the type to sit back and watch but want to be in the action,
  hanging out in popular inns (Silver Branch, Royal Stag, Jolly Beggar) may
  increase your chances of meeting new people. Also, frequenting the OOC
  may let you talk more freely without getting frowned at by the stricter
  roleplayers. Attending OOC events like the Q&A sessions are also good
  places to talk about the game and various aspects of it. One of the best
  ways to meet people on the mud is to be friendly and outgoing yourself.
  Don't just walk by someone who's bleeding, offer them a bandage, they may
  not need one, but it may start a conversation. (You can still do this
  even if you're roleplaying an evil character too! *wink*).

  If you're interested in ways outside of the game, check out Straussy's
  Photo Page ( and the LegendMUD
  Club page ( There's also a post
  with many players ICQ numbers on the news board. If you get the chance to
  go to a LegendMEET, GO! They're a lot of fun and you get to see other
  sides of the people.

The Gaming Experience
  If you're the type that likes to power level, look for other names on
  info that come up frequently. Cultivate a few skills that are useful to
  groups and offer your services to groups on channels. When you're along
  on a group on a dangerous mission, pay attention to the group dynamics,
  learn to lead the adventure yourself. Curious to learn how other people
  manage to do things that you can't seem to accomplish on your own? Ask
  them... they will probably be happy to show off for you. It's also a good
  idea to have a discovery of your own to trade for this info too.

The Clan Scene
  It's always good to have a bunch of friends to hang out with, and clans
  are one way to formalize a subgroup that has similar interests and goals.
  The GM Guide, which covers Planning, Forming and Maintaining a Clan as
  well as Developing a Clan RP and Dealing with Problems which can be found
  at and Sandra's Clan Building
  Seminar at
  are both great resources to visit BEFORE you start a new clan or after
  you've started one and want some pointers whether it's a PK or RP clan.

The Playerkilling Scene
  If you're interested in finding other people to pkill with, sign up for
  any and all PK Tourneys and games, they're good practice and full of
  others interested in PK. Also check the CLANS list and War board for
  other people who are part of the PK community. Talk to people who seem
  passionate about it. Also, check out the new connection analysis reports
  in the LTs. They now have a better detailed description of each hour on
  each day of the week. If you're looking for Accept All action, Mon-Thu
  from 3pm to midnight and Saturday nights from 8pm until 10pm system time
  are your best bets.

The Roleplaying Scene
  If you're looking for deeper interaction between characters in the game,
  check the CLANS list, the news board, and read the LT for things that
  look interesting to you. If you're looking to start a new roleplay group,
  put an ad on the news board and in the LT. If you like how someone is
  roleplaying, drop them a note and tell them that! If someone is in the
  middle of what seems like a really cool scenario, don't just barge in--
  drop them a tell or a note to see if they could use some help or have
  any roles that need filled.
Which brings us to the next topic... Conveying your RP to others...
or How Do You Let Everyone Know Your Character is Evil and You're Really
A Nice Guy in Real Life?



                          March Madness Tinyplot

Logs of the March Madness Tinyplot are now available online!

Visit to read how
Aaaaarrgh and Tancred switched bodies and Chaykin became a businessman, and
how a coalition formed to restore them to their proper form.

Visit to read about the
events of the following week, in which Zafira became fascinated with Tancred,
McDougan lost what little power to speak rationally he previously possessed,
Tobias and Aardwolf became absurdly intoxicated, and Arturo, Myshella, and
Slytherin discovered a cure -- and a cause -- for the strange disease which
afflicted their comrades.


                    LegendMUD Connection Analysis
                            March 2001

                       Peak Mortal Players 70
                         Average Peak was 56
                    Peak PKOK Enabled Players 35
             Pkokenabled Characters represent approximately
                       50% of active players.

                   Peak Accept All Characters 12
             Accept All Characters represent approximately
   8% of all active characters and 16% of active pkok enabled characters.

The first two tables below show the Average Mortal Players,  Average
PKOK Enabled Players, and the number that were "Accept All" connected
to Legend by hour of the day as polled approximately on the hour
system time during the period noted above.

The third table shows the same averages calculated by the day of week.

              hour  0  1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9 10 11
              avg  31 25 19 16 13 13 13 15 19 23 26 27
              pke  16 13 11  9  7  7  6  7  9 13 14 14
              aas   2  2  2  1  1  1  1  1  2  2  2  2

              hour 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23
              avg  32 35 37 41 42 41 44 45 45 46 42 35
              pke  16 17 18 20 20 19 19 20 22 23 21 17
              aas   3  2  3  2  2  2  3  3  3  3  3  3

              day   MON  TUE  WED  THU  FRI  SAT  SUN
              avg    31   32   31   29   26   29   33
              pke    16   16   16   14   13   14   15
              aas     2    2    3    2    2    2    2

This last table breaks down each hour by the day of the week in detail.

      MON       TUE       WED       THU       FRI       SAT       SUN
 0: 32 16  2| 27 15  2| 32 16  2| 29 16  3| 28 14  2| 31 16  3| 36 18  3
 1: 26 14  2| 24 15  2| 26 14  3| 23 11  2| 22 12  2| 24 13  2| 32 15  3
 2: 20 11  1| 18 12  2| 23 14  3| 15  8  1| 18 11  2| 18 10  1| 25 12  2
 3: 19 11  1| 13  7  1| 16 10  2| 13  8  2| 13  8  1| 14  8  1| 25 13  1
 4: 14  8  1| 11  6  0| 14  7  1| 13  8  2| 11  6  1| 12  6  0| 21 11  1
 5: 13  6  0| 13  7  1| 14  5  1| 11  6  1| 12  7  0| 11  5  0| 19 11  2
 6: 12  6  0| 16  7  1| 14  6  1| 12  6  1| 12  6  1| 11  5  0| 16  8  1
 7: 13  5  1| 18  9  1| 17  6  2| 15  6  2| 12  5  1| 14  7  0| 17  7  0
 8: 17  8  2| 22 12  2| 20 10  3| 19  9  2| 17  9  2| 18  8  0| 21  9  1
 9: 21 12  2| 25 14  2| 26 14  4| 25 13  2| 21 12  3| 21 12  1| 24 12  1
10: 21 13  2| 31 16  2| 26 15  3| 25 13  2| 23 12  3| 28 16  3| 28 14  1
11: 27 13  1| 30 15  2| 29 17  4| 25 14  3| 21  9  2| 27 14  2| 32 16  1
12: 30 17  3| 37 17  2| 30 17  4| 31 16  3| 27 13  2| 34 17  3| 38 17  1
13: 35 19  3| 35 17  2| 32 16  3| 31 16  2| 30 15  2| 42 21  3| 39 18  2
14: 39 19  4| 41 21  2| 41 20  2| 32 17  2| 30 14  2| 38 19  3| 39 18  2
15: 44 22  4| 44 22  2| 45 23  3| 41 21  3| 37 16  2| 38 18  2| 43 19  1
16: 47 24  3| 47 24  2| 46 20  2| 39 20  2| 36 14  3| 38 19  3| 43 19  2
17: 46 22  4| 45 22  2| 46 20  2| 43 21  2| 34 15  3| 36 16  2| 40 16  1
18: 48 20  3| 45 21  2| 45 21  3| 50 22  4| 33 15  2| 42 17  3| 42 16  1
19: 48 22  3| 50 21  4| 43 22  3| 47 20  3| 36 17  3| 44 19  3| 45 19  1
20: 49 26  4| 47 23  3| 51 28  6| 44 21  3| 42 21  2| 41 19  3| 46 19  2
21: 47 24  3| 50 27  5| 50 28  4| 48 23  3| 43 23  3| 45 21  2| 42 19  4
22: 44 23  4| 51 27  3| 33 18  2| 40 20  2| 42 22  3| 43 22  3| 42 20  3
23: 34 18  2| 38 18  2| 30 16  2| 32 16  2| 37 17  3| 39 19  3| 39 18  3


                          Gangwars PK Tourney

The final results for the tournament have been tallied.

The Ghosthawks and the Michigan Militia have tied with 21 points each!  The
Drunks have second place with 16 points and the Mafia made a strong showing
with 9 points, followed by CoPS with 6 points.

Congratulations to the winners. Watch the events list for the latest
information on scheduled PK activities!

    /\                            RECENT UPDATES
   /  \   
  /    \                        RECENT CODE UPDATES
 /_    _\   
   |  |     Balance Changes
   |  |       o Harder to break magical slumbers.
   |  |     Misc Changes
   |__|       o Eloquence skill not longer required to use moods --
    /\          everyone can now use them.
   /  \       o New "discuss" command for the eloquence skill which allows
  /    \        verbal debates
 /_    _\     o When illusionary mobs are dispelled by dispel illusion they
   |  |         now drop any eq. that they have
   |  |       o "hunt" with no arguments while hunting stops you hunting
   |  |       o New mood -- excited
   |__|       o New social -- wash
    /\      Bug Fixes
   /  \       o Players should be able to put items inside furniture in
  /    \        their friends houses
 /_    _\     o No longer possible to juggle items that you can't see or
   |  |         couldn't otherwise carry (due to weight or item number
   |  |         restrictions)
   |  |       o Stun self no longer gives back the incorrect amount of mana
   |__|       o Empty vial now echos correctly
    /\        o Empty vial now leaves behind an empty vial
   /  \       o If you're holding a bow and have a two-handed gun in your
  /    \        inventory, "shoot person" will no longer give you "you
 /_    _\       can't quickdraw a two- handed weapon"
   |  |       o Judge no longer duplicates the last line on certain mobs
   |  |       o Inspiring stunned people no longer gives the message that
   |  |         they weren't fighting if they were.
   |__|       o Armslore no longer has a minor rounding error for certain
    /\          weapon averages
   /  \       o Emoteto now checks that the conversions are correct and
  /    \        that an = exists before printing any messages
 /_    _\   Typo Fixes
   |  |       o GMs "may build"... (instead of "my build")
   |  |       o "weight of Foo's weapon throws Foo to the ground" now says
   |  |         "weight of Foo's weapon now throws him to the ground"
   /  \                           RECENT AREA UPDATES
  /    \    Ancient India
 /_    _\     Changes the path to the mystic so that it is no longer
   |  |       solitary.
   |  |     Tortuga
   |  |       SMASHED ON THE ROCKS! DT less arbitrary distributing strings.
   |__|     Salem and Boston
    /\        Puts in a para check on Nathaniel, fixes some minor things
   /  \       on Hester and Arthur.
  /    \    Arabian Nights
 /_    _\     The scholar responds to both "ask" and "talk" now. Sorry
   |  |       about that. Fixed various typos and thieves won't fight
   |  |       among themselves so much.
   |  |     Sherwood
   |__|       Allan should always have his lyre now.
    /\      Celtic Ireland
   /  \       Young warriors should be more discriminating to whom they
  /    \      show their swords. Added some keywords and fixed some minor
 /_    _\     typos. Experienced and elite warriors buffed up slightly
   |  |     African Savanna & Zanzibar
   |  |       Minor typo fixes and Sayyid Said has a new long description.
   |  |       If he's not resting on his divan he won't say he is.
   |__|     Port of London, The Alhambra, Ancient Nazca, Aztecs, San
    /\      Francisco, and Medieval Seas
   /  \       All had minor typos fixed or had some responses to keywords
  /    \      added.
 /_    _\   
   |  |     As always, we ask that if you find any bugs/typos or have ideas
   |  |     for new items, reactions for mobs, quest hints or any other
   |  |     sort of thing in certain area or areas, please use the
   |__|     bug/idea/typo channels.

  _______   ____    _______
 /  ___  \ / __ \  /  ___  \  Logs of Q&A sessions are available on the
 | /   \ | \ \/ /  | /   \ |  web pages for those who are unable to attend
 | |   | |  \  /   | \___/ |  or had to leave early. The most recent ones
 | |   | |  /  \/\ |  ___  |  are listed on the sitemap page or you can
 | | /\| | / /\  / | /   \ |  get a complete list on the Q&A index page
 | \_\ \ | \ \/  \ | \   / |  at the url below.
  \___\/_/  \__/\/ \_/   \_|
                               RECENT TOPICS

 o Empty & Damaged Vials           o Reloading Missile Weapons
 o Player Shops/Hirelings/Pets?    o Discuss & Eloquence Reimbs?
 o Mob Interactions & Age          o Example Builder Proposal?
 o Greater Summons                 o Stunned Mobs Doing Specials?
 o More on Reloading               o Soloing without a Healer?
 o More Notice for Good Deeds?     o Reimbs for Eloquence?
 o Boosting PK                     o Redeeming out of PKOK?
 o Unlearning Skills?              o PK Timer
 o More on Boosting PK             o Mutual Accepts on Who?
 o XP Loss Changes?                o XP and PKill & Clan Wars
 o Immorts Grouping with Morts?    o Gang Wars Tourney
 o Looting & PKOK 


                      .+'''+.            .+'''+.
                      Horoscopes by Mme. Decara
  | PISCES        (Feb 20 - Mar 20) | ARIES         (Mar 21 - Apr 19) |
  |                                 |                                 |
  | Sea travel and tropical dangers | Assert yourself and stand up for|
  | are lessened as your compassion | what you know is right. Only you|
  | and empathy guide with caution. | can allow another to hurt you.  |
  | TAURUS        (Apr 20 - May 20) | GEMINI        (May 21 - Jun 20) |
  |                                 |                                 |
  | Your dependability & creativity | You know that there is always   |
  | are valued by others. Surround  | more than one way of looking at |
  | yourself with friends & beauty. | the world eagerly explore them. |
  | CANCER        (Jun 21 - Jul 22) | LEO           (Jul 23 - Aug 22) |
  |                                 |                                 |
  | Connections with others around  | Entertainment & generosity come |
  | you are a driving force. Don't  | easily but don't let pride sting|
  | drop old ones for newer ones.   | if not praised immediately.     | 
  | VIRGO         (Aug 23 - Sep 22) | LIBRA         (Sep 23 - Oct 23) |
  |                                 |                                 |
  | You work to improve things for  | Motivated to initiate one-to-one|
  | all with your conscienciousness,| relationships, your charm and   |
  | energy & organizational skills. | diplomacy shine brilliantly.    |
  | SCORPIO       (Oct 24 - Nov 22) | SAGITTARIUS   (Nov 23 - Dec 21) |
  |                                 |                                 |
  | Don't let others mistake your   | Don't let independence obstruct |
  | mysterious nature for iciness.  | adventure and exploration. Two  |
  | Don't reveal secrets too soon.  | swords are better than one.     |
  | CAPRICORN     (Dec 22 - Jan 19) | AQUARIUS      (Jan 20 - Feb 19) |
  |                                 |                                 |
  | Focus on maintaining structure  | Your friendliness draws others  |
  | in your social web, and strive  | to you and respect you for your |
  | to maintain high standards too. | fair mindedness and motivations.|

          /                        \
      o O | Wonder what folks are   |
 `\|||/   | doing over at LegendMUD?|
 (o o)    \________________________/

  ___                                                                  ___
  \ |------------------------------------------------------------------| /
  /__|  LEGENDITES: Information Regarding the People of Our World     |__\


-- Judah has reached 100 million experience!

-- The Fields of Albion Clan was formed on March 19. The Dread Lords of
   Legend Clan disbanded. The clan was disbanded for low membership.

-- As well as no longer being a member of the Awooga, Denstra Alderon is no
   longer longing for her long lost love Emrys; Denstra has found love in her
   husband Ganymede and can be seen in her best spirits as:

     a fiery, effervescent druidess.
     A sweetly mischievous woman searches a musty rune bag for the right herb.


-- [Chat] An air sprite: There once was a doctor named Mertjai, who
   lived in a shop just off the highway; she ordered a burger, turned out to
   be a lurker; now Merty's sick, but the burger is just okay.


                          On Myself and Other Things

Yes, I have been gone a very long time. Some of you may have heard of me in
the earliest annals of the Legendary Times, a Connaught girl who fell in with
Guppies and babysat Alexandria and her Pink Bunny from Hell. Do rest assured,
that any other Moiras you may have seen since that time were not in fact
myself, myself hopefully being me.

So what have I been doing with myself all these years?

Well, when the Connaught clan found out that I had joined the Anti-Paladins,
they were really unhappy. Especially after I broke off my engagement. So they
packed me off to one of those new fangled Christian convents. Some of the
Counnaughts are pretty cool, especially my Uncle Bart, but most of them are
hide bound traditionalists that can't bear the thought of wayward girls
wandering around.

So it was off to the convent and 73 Ways of Growing Onions. When I flat out
refused to learn the 74th way, the nuns decided that I would make a really
great Anchoress, and proceeded to seal me up in a cell and forget that I was
there. Which was exceedingly handy once I managed to escape from the cell. I
pretended to be the laundress and waltzed out the front door.

In the ensuing years, I have lost my taste for catfish and guppies. And I
have decided to return to my childhood roots, to the bosom of Nature. And so
I have joined the Fields of Albion in their efforts to Stand Up For Nature.
We are especially concerned about that London monstrosity that got plopped
down in the middle of Sherwood. The fight will be long, but we shall

- Moira Connaught


                            Melting Frost

Kerstin felt cold.

It was the first thing she'd felt in a while, so it was a bit odd.

After feeling nothing long? seconds? years?, Kerstin felt cold.

It sent a thrill through her body. She felt COLD. It was something. It was
something to focus on. It cleared her mind. She concentrated on the cold, how
it felt in her fingers. She concentrated on how it made her teeth chatter.
She concentrated on how badly she was shivering.

She realized that she wanted to get warm.

She was lying on a bed of furs, so she wrapped them around herself and
huddled there for awhile, conserving heat until she felt a bit warmer.
Finally, she sat up gingerly, like an old woman.

Where was she? What was going on? She felt like she had been...sleeping? No,
more than that. Dead? Well, somewhat less than dead, for there she was. She
mostly felt like she had been...cold. Frozen, maybe.

And she had to admit, that was pretty weird. Being the North Wind's daughter
does have some advantages, one of those being that she honestly could not
ever remember having felt cold before. Yet what else could it be? Even
through the furs she could feel it - a bitter cold that seemed to penetrate
to her bones. 

She looked around, blinking through gummed eyelids. She saw Yes,
ice. Ice like a glacier, or like the bottom of a deep crevasse. An
eye-hurting blue, pale and pure. She was lying on some sort of stone table,
or altar. Off to her right it seemed lighter. Was she in a cave?

One way to find out. Wincing at the pain in her joints, she stood. What an
odd feeling, to stand after having lain dormant for...she knew not how long.
And yet she stood. So she was not a cripple. That much was good to know..
Clutching the furs tightly around her, she walked towards the light. If
there were answers to be had, Kerstin thought they must be that way.


                           In a Muddy Field

Hauptmann Gottfried Von Luttke looked up...did he just hear his name?  There
it was again...turning his head, he saw his childhood friend, Hauptmann
Emil Von Plettenberg walking over at a fast stride.  "Ahh, Emil, how goes
the battle?" Gottfried asked his friend.  "Bah, you hear the fool's latest
idea?" Emil responded, referring to their commander, Sepp Dietrich.  With a
subdued chuckle and a roll of his eyes, Gottfried pointed to the map before
him, "Show me where the idiot wants us to move now." 

*   *   *   *   *

Mikhail hunched a little lower, as he hid in the trees and looked through the
scope on his sniper rifle.  Already he had 15 kills to his credit.  He
planned to add significantly to that total.  He could still remember the day
when the notice had come.  His little brother, Petya, dead at the hands of
those damn invading Krauts.  The next day he had enlisted, and when they
learned of his hunting skills, and blind hatred for any and all Germans, he
was assigned to be a sniper.  All these thoughts went through his head in but
a moment.  Looking through his scope he began to search for a target.

*   *   *   *   *

"Confound it!  That idiot will lose us the Stalingrad campaign YET!"
Gottfried shouted. "How does he expect us to follow orders such as this...We
thought our losses were heavy BEFORE!" "I agree old friend, but on this
field, he is the king, we, just knights." Emil responded.  "What if we did
this..." They both hunched over the map again, Emil outlining a plan, that
while incorporating what Sepp Dietrich ordered, had a few surprises
involved.  Gottfried nodded in agreement, "This will work my friend, soon we
shall be drinking together from inside the city of Stalingrad." With that,
the two men stood.

*   *   *   *   *

Mikhail spotted the two men, hunched over a table.  While he was not exactly
sure, he knew the two men were both officers.  Such luck...with a sly grin
Mikhail prepared to fire.

*   *   *   *   *

Gottfried smiled at his friend and embraced him.  It was good to be with
friends in such an awful place.  As Emil turned to go, he recalled all the
times they had had in Prussia, much better than this wasteland, why his 
generals wanted it, he would never know.  He turned back to the map to further
study the planned maneuvers.  It was then he heard the shot.  He spun around
trying to see who was shooting...and then he saw Emil.  Emil was standing
there, a look of shock on his face..."Gottfried?" he managed to utter before
falling against his friend, a spreading stain on his chest.  "EMIL! EMIL!"
Gottfried yelled as he lowered his friend to the ground, looking frantically
around for a medic.  But he knew it was too late, Emil's breath was shallow
as he looked up at his friend, and then he died.

*   *   *   *   *

Mikhail picked up his spent shell casing as he began to back further into the
woods. "That's another for you Petya." He muttered as he disappeared into
the trees.


featuring the daring Miss Honey Ryder

'and do you know what he did then, darlings?' cried the striking young woman
at the head of the table.  Almost as one, her intimate group of friends
leaned closer to the fiery storyteller, their eager faces flushed from
careless consumption of expensive French champagne. Honey frowned at the
nearest girl who, leaning a little too close, almost knocked the freshly
filled champagne saucer from her hand.

'I say old girl, steady on.' She transferred the glass of her favourite
bubbly to her left hand, the smile sparkling her enormous violet eyes taking
the sting out of her words. 'One mustn't waste such a fine beverage you

'Oh DO go on, Honey dear,' cried Charlie from the other side of the table.
'We are all just DYING to know how it ended!' Raising the glass to her
faintly rouged lips, Honey took a long swallow of Bollinger, Grand Ann 36,
and considered the raven-haired beauty seated opposite her.  Lady Charlotte
Carter-White, heiress to the famous Carter-White fortune, titles and estates,
was quite possibly the most pretentious person Honey had ever had the
displeasure of meeting.  Of course she was just DYING to know how the affair
had ended...Charlie had been gunning for Pete for the last two years, right
under Honey's nose!

Perhaps she should just keep her in suspense and pretend that she hadn't
broken up with the Earl, just to torment the smug cow.  Yes, that sounded
much more appealing.  Murmurs of agreement from her other girlfriends,
however, caused her to relent.  They were a silly lot, all wide-eyed,
addle-pated bubbleheads, daughters of minor English lords.  But, she had to
admit, they were rather sweet and, most of the time, helped to take her mind
off the more serious aspects of her existence.  After a quick, cold glance at
the overenthusiastic Charlie, Honey turned her attention to the girls seated
closer to her and smiled.

'As I was saying, she began again. 'I said, Peter, dear, you know I mean what
I say. It's over once and for all. -- and he completely ignored me!  Then and
believe me darlings, this will shock you as much as it did me --- he pulled a
tiny box from his pocket and got down on his knees before me.'  A collective
gasp escaped from her attentive audience. Her smile widened in gratification
at the blatant outrage and disbelief on Charlie's face at her assumption of
what she was about to reveal.  After draining the last of the contents of the
exquisite crystal glass in her hand, she leaned into the circle, lowering her
voice for a more dramatic effect. 'Then, my dears, he asked me....'

'Ryder! Telephone for Miss Honey Ryder!' A well-groomed teenager in beige
trousers and black jacket entered the room, his attire pronouncing him an
employee of the riding club they had been frequenting of late.  He scanned
the room, his plain, round face a mask of politeness and impartiality as he
repeated his call.  Honey laughed quietly and placed the empty glass on the
table before her.

'Over here, Evans,' she called, waving her right hand slightly.  Face
lighting up at the sight of her, the young man waddled over to their table,
his smile turning into a frown of uncertainty as he caught the expressions of
dismay and, in one case, downright hatred, from the rest of her party.  He
stopped suddenly and flushed, lowering his eyes to the floor.

'Terribly sorry to interrupt, Miss Ryder, but there's a gentleman on the
telephone for you.'  He turned as if to leave, never once raising his eyes.
'He says it's dreadfully important,' he added before executing an abrupt,
half-bow, and quickly escaping the room.  Secretly overjoyed at the
perturbation his words had caused, Honey rose and, to the complete vexation
of her soon-to-be-abandoned friends, headed off in the direction that Evans
had taken.

With a bright 'Toodles all!' flung over her shoulder as she strode through
the French doors, she entered the club foyer, the disgruntled voices of her
companions fading with each step.  Once through the doors, she scanned the
room for young Evans, marveling all over again at the grandeur of the

The dark timber paneling reaching half-way up the walls matched perfectly
the brightly polished floor, a stark contrast to the upper-walls and ceiling,
freshly painted white.  Here and there one could glimpse an Old Master or
two.  She paused, goggle-eyed  was that an original Renoir?  She shook her
head slightly and continued on her way towards the large, mahogany reception
counter.  Apart from the paintings, it was the rooms only adornment.

The click-clack of her black leather heels against the recently-waxed floor
alerted the young lad to her presence.  'Miss Ryder!'  Turning at the sound
of her name, she espied young Evans standing behind the reception desk, his
small, dark eyes full of unspoken apologies. 'Thank you Evans,' she said,
smiling warmly. 'You certainly are a timely fellow. You don't know how
pleased I am that you appeared at just that moment.'  She nodded her
compliments to the astounded stewards supervisor, lurking nearby.

Evans' eyes widened with a mixture of relief and confusion and Honey was
quite sure he would even have gaped if his supervisor had not been observing
him like a hawk.  Glancing at the large, old-fashioned phone before him, he
reiterated weakly, 'Gentleman on the phone for you, Miss Ryder,' and handed
her the receiver before shuffling to the far end of the counter.  Her amused
eyes on Evans' retreating figure, Honey placed the receiver against her ear.

'Ryder here,' she announced.  A nasty crackle answered her, the static
interference causing her to grimace.  She cleared her throat and repeated
herself, hoping that this time she would be heard.  'Oh, good afternoon,
Ryder,' a young gentleman's voice crackled in her ear.  His voice faded
slightly and she could hear a curious sound in the background.  She strained
to hear what it was, disappointment washing over her like a cold bucket of
water.  It was only the sound of a typewriter.  Someone was hard at work,
wherever the caller was.

'Timmins here, the smug voice continued, confirming the worst of her fears.
'Oh, good afternoon,' she greeted him, trying desperately to keep the
disappointment from her voice.  She heard a low chuckle and instantly cursed
herself for giving the young sycophant the satisfaction of knowing that he'd
spoiled her fun.  'Lovely to hear your voice too, my dear,' Mr. Timmins

She tapped the toe of her boot against the floor, impatient for the bad news
the wretch would surely be delivering. 'Only too gladly, I'll bet,' she added
quietly, giving voice to her thoughts.  'What was that?' the despised voice
at her ear enquired.  She muttered something under her breath, hoping the
static on the line would be her ally.

Catching young Evans' eye, she gestured towards the receiver, rolling her
eyes dramatically.  He smiled and moved as if to respond to the gesture
until, reminded of his supervisors presence by the glare directed towards
him, he suddenly found some filing to do in the office adjoining the
reception area.  Honey giggled and shifted the receiver to her left ear.
'And he wants to see you immediately, Ryder,' the smarmy voice was

She bit her lip in consternation at having missed the first half of his
instructions.  The monotonous drone continued, but she interrupted his
rambling with a sharp, 'Timmins! Do repeat what you just said, there's a good

A loud tut and remonstrance of 'Ryder, don't you ever listen?' later, and
Honey gleaned that she was to meet her employer at his office, without
delay.  She sighed dejectedly and nodded to herself. 'Righto, Timmins. Tell
him I'll be there shortly,' she advised. After replacing the receiver on the
phone, she nodded her thanks at Evans' supervisor, and crossed the room,
heading towards the ladies' changing rooms. It definitely would not be
fitting to appear at a meeting with the head of British Intelligence in
fraying jodhpurs and mud-spattered riding boots.

Legendary Times is published by the immortals of LegendMUD. Please send
all replies, additions, or corrections to our address at
for inclusion in the next edition. We, however, reserve the right to
moderate this discussion, and may object to some submissions.
Previous Issue Main Index Next Issue