Legendary Times vol.7 no.2
Previous Issue Main Index Next Issue =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= .............._______ ............./ / THE LEGENDARY TIMES ............/ / .........../ /.....______.._____.....______.._____.......____ ........../ /...../ /./ \.../ /./ \...../ \ ........./ /...../ ___/./ ____/../ ___/./ __. \.../ /\ \ ......../ /...../ /_.../ /....../ /_.../ /..\>./ /./ / ......./ /...../ __/../ /____../ __/../ /.../ /./ /./ / ....../ /_____/__/__../ \_\ /./ /__../ /.../ /./ /_/ / ...../ / /./ /./ /./ /.../ /./ / ..../ /_/..\______/./_____/./__/.../__/./_______/ MUD .../________________/ running on mud.legendmud.org 9999 208.188.102.145 9999 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= http://www.legendmud.org/ ftp://ftp.legendmud.org/pub =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= VOLUME SEVEN, ISSUE TWO January 18th, 2000 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TABLE OF CONTENTS NEWS & REPORTS - Trivia! - - Is Role-Play Dead? No, It Just Got out of the Emergency Room. - LEGENDITES - Announcements - - The McDougan Report - - Surviving LegendMUD - ___ ___ \ |------------------------------------------------------------------| / /__| UPCOMING CALENDAR OF EVENTS |__\ '------------------------------------------------------------------'>-/\*/\-/\*/\-/\*/\-/\ January /\-/\*/\-/\*/\-/\*/\- The McDougan Report: Shupport yer local Pirate! The oother day I met oop wi' Guapo, A michty pirate o' auld acquaintanshe. Unfairttunately, he was nae ash shcary ash he micht hae been, ash he had shrunk greatly in valour and micht after a wee shpell hed retairned him tae myshtich level eight. Och, puir lad! Howe'er, he'sh a guid lad, shae gie him heelp gin ye can. Aye, pirates are nae tae be "Dred"ed they can be nishe ladsh, if they hae foony accentsh (Thoo nae ash foony ash yer average Shoothron Eenglish, or Merkin, oor Liverpudlian, oor Yorkshireman.. Althoo the lasht twa are much tae be deshired over the oothersh in noon-accent criteria. Feer inshtanshe, read tha' buik by the Greet Shcotch author (The Scotch hash been shpillen on shome o' the pagesh - shrrry (grin)) George MacDonald Frasier, "The Pyrates" Be warned thoo, itsh coompletely in Pyratical brogue, whash better than an English brogue, but a bit shtreenge tae thoshe wha're meer familiar wi' a proper shpeakin' lad like m'shel. Frasier alsho wrote aboot Flashman, who be a typical shoothron Englishman: Evil. Shee alsho Tom Brown'sh Shcooldaysh. Och, noo, shoom may ashk hoo I beceem shae weel read. Weel, booger off. Naen o' ye bushnesh. Beshidesh, eef I shquint enoof.... Eenyway, joosht remeember: if a groop o' piratesh attack, ye need nae flee. Joosht shlap 'em oon the back and offer tae buy them a dreenk at the pub, proovided they dunt burn it doon. Wairksh eevry time. Tae avooid looshin tha' free drink tae shpreadin flamesh, they weel prooly avoid burnin anythin aroond it. Thush, get a houshe by the pub. Oor in it. The McDoogan Repoort: Proovidin usheful infeermation. Prooly. -McDougan, Hic! Surviving LegendMUD By Arte So on the first day in this strange place they called Tara, I met my first companion. I thought I could get him to help me with tips on how to survive in this place. To the corner of the room sat a man cloaked in the surrounding shadows. He was stiff and unmoving, staring into the empty space just beyond the front doors to the inn. Being as polite as I could, I approached and asked if he can help me. Nothing. Nothing at all. He didn't even blink! I thought he might be deep in thought and had not heard me speaking so I tapped him on the shoulders. Again, he sat there like a stone statue. Suddenly, a tall man rushes in through the front door and asked the man praise. He sprang from his seat and began singing about some Agrabah Mafia. What is the meaning of this? There were no other men in the room so where are these club wielding men ready to break my bones if I didn't pay my protection fee? And where are these sands of Arabian nights that this man so passionately sings about? After a seemingly endless song about the 'Agrabah Mafia' -- to label it as a song is generous as it only had the same 4 words over and over again -- he sat right back down into the same place and remained motionless afterwards. Determined to make contact with this person, I waved my hands wildly before him. Still nothing. Finally I gave up and sat down at a table on the other side. Just as I was about to open my LegendMUD FAQ sheet, this gigantic human, no less than 20 feet tall, walks right through the front door. The door was shattered along with wall that the door use to reside. I can hear the innkeeper screaming from the back, 'DAMNIT, How many times do I have to tell you not to bring him in here! Every couple of hours, I need to fix the whole friggin wall again. You don't even PAY me to stay here for the night.' The titan then walked straight for the stiff man at the corner breaking tables, chairs, and destroying the roof in the process. The titan gave the man a bandage and he bandaged the titan like any good doctor would. So that's why he came all this way, destroying everything in his path. He came for a boo boo on his leg. I was about faint. Amazed and frightened, I ran for the door. But with my luck, I ran into a lady nearly knocking her over. I tried to apologize but only showed my clumsiness and how new I was to this whole place. To my surprise, she was really nice about it. But something wasn't right. She took a strange knife out of her pocket and was about to cut me to pieces! Now I've done it. I haven't even made it out of the inn and someone's going to kill me. JUST GREAT. It turns out that she's a doctor of some sort. In fact, she leads a clan called the United Surgeons of Legend or USL for short. Boy was I relieved that I wasn't going to die my first hour here. Not only did she not kill me, she gave me 1000 gold coins and gave me tons of tips to get started. So with the help of this lady named Mertjai, I headed off. For days I wandered around the city, helping the city clean up its mice problem. Apparently, there were an endless supply. The more I kill, the more appeared at my feet. I was about to give up until I met a group of adventurers lead by a lady called Pobby. They invited me to join them and I agreed. But I was quickly disappointed by the fact that we weren't going to leave Tara so I bid them farewell and ventured forth on my own. Wandering around aimless for days, I finally met a man named Kaizen. He led a group of inexperienced adventurers like myself and soon we were smoking a pipe of tobacco with an Indian Chief. This was the high life I thought. It was going great until the chief said to go sleep with an animal. Immediately I turned my head and frowned to Kaizen. This wasn't what I signed up for! Get me out of here! Of course things aren't always what they seem here. They explained to me the philosophy behind the task and respectfully, I accepted. They gave me a couple of choices but sleeping beside a giant black bear didn't sound too safe, so I settled for a turtle. Afterall, what's it going to do? Bite me? Ok, so it did. Now let us never mention it again. This world is populated with all sorts of strange people with all sorts of strange traditions. Christmas firs were growing all over the place even on paved streets. They just seem to sprout out of the cobble stones, in the middle of the Serengeti, out of the golden Arabian sands, and wooden tiles of the inns! And this crazy lady outside the inn was talking about Gana and Rom. Of course I could not understand a word she said. Finally she spoke me in English. Arani was her name and we talked a little about our travels. Even though she seemed less experienced than me, she offered me her white shield. Are people always this friendly? Anyway, I think I have a lot to learn before I get the hang of this. They said they will take me to see some kings in the Shadowlands one of these days. I don't care what they're kings of, I just hope they're nice and give me some money so I can retire early. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Legendary Times is published by the immortals of LegendMUD. Please send all replies, additions, or corrections to our address at lt@mud.sig.net for inclusion in the next edition. We, however, reserve the right to moderate this discussion, and may object to some submissions. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Previous Issue Main Index Next Issue
